This and That

What a day!

Yesterday started rough. I got a call at 3:30 in the morning from my mom asking us to take her to the ER. We think it ended up being an ulcer (running more tests today and next week), but at first it was looking slightly heart attack'ish. Anyone who has been reading me for several years knows my dad died two years ago from a sudden heart attack. You can understand that it scared me to death. Having to walk right past the room in the ER that I found out my dad had died is really awful. Thank God that wasn't the case with my mom. Still, we need to get it figured out. The hospital drugged her up so much that I had to watch her at her house all day. My mom and I are serious light weights and taking a benadryl makes us loopy.

At two, I had to leave to go to my new doctors appointment. This was the right decision. The attitudes were so much more positive and they were shocked by the "dead baby" stories I was told about at the old docs. I'm really glad I made this choice. I think this is going to be a much more positive experience. I didn't actually meet my doctor yet, but I loved the midwife I met with.

Good News from the appointment:

• Uterus measuring perfectly on target
• Still 3 pound negative gain. I was given permission to "eat whatever I want". Woo-hoo!
• Baby's heartbeat found instantly and beating in the high 150's.
  
• Made 20 week u/s appointment. Can't wait to see the changes in baby!

Bad News from the appointment:

• Blood pressure was through the roof. :( Possibly from the stress of yesterday, but I seem to have hormonally induced high blood pressure. I can't take birth control pills for the same reason. I'm buying a home blood pressure cuff to monitor it. Looks like I'm headed for BP meds for the duration of the pregnancy though.
• I had a little bit of a temperature. Again they think it was probably from my tough day. My fever is gone today and I have been ordered to "take it easy" this weekend.

It was an exhausting day and I crashed hard last night. Definite stress, but I'm grateful and hopeful for the outcomes.

Can you believe there is only 24 days until I'm half way done with this pregnancy?! Me either.


Miss X

Awed ***UPDATED***

Oh! I *think*, I *think* I may have felt the baby move this morning!

I felt a very, very, very light fluttery feeling down on the left where I know (from the doppler) that the baby hangs out there. I thought that maybe it was the baby, but not convinced. Then I took out my doppler to listen to the heartbeat. I found it and while listening I felt the little fluttery feeling again and then the baby's heartbeat moved to a different spot!

Do you think it could have really been the baby?! Oh! Oh! I hope! I'm almost crying, I am so awed and humbled. My baby. Oh my gosh.


Miss X


***UPDATE***
I just definitely felt the baby! I felt this flippy sensation and then an actual jab/kick! It was fairly strong and actually startled me. I jumped and said "Oh!". Then I burst into tears because it was so amazing. There are no words to express this. Thank you God.

Wonders Never Cease

I just this minute got a call from the office manager of the original doctors office. No apologies, but whatever. Said she understood I needed to feel comfortable with my doctor. She said that they should be in the process of getting my records to me and that the billing people will call me next week to get me my credit.

Thank God, I can hopefully start putting this behind me. Thanks to all of you wonderful ladies for your great support!


Miss X

Repeat Chorus

Still no return calls. Blah. Blah. Blah.

I've never seen a business attempt to operate like this. Yesterday late afternoon I got annoyed and called. I didn't say who I was and just asked for a records release form. The girl was super nice and faxed it right over. I filled it out and faxed it back. Somehow I'm expecting a slow down once they see my name on it.

At this point I'm not going to even try calling them today. They are so unprofessional it is insane! The funny part about the whole thing is that I was never anything but super polite to them. What in the heck is there problem? They do realize they can't make me stay there, right? Crazy. It just makes me that much more sure of my decision to move on. I just hope they don't hold up my records.

Oh yeah! Good news. Contacted my insurance company about the switch and they said it was no problem whatsoever. Phew! Very important and such a relief. I'm ready to be done with this whole mess. Back to feeling blissful. I'm pregnant, people! This is a HAPPY time!


Miss X

Wow ****Updated****

So no one ever called me back from the Dr.'s office, even though I called them in the morning yesterday. I can't even believe the whole thing!

Yesterday I called the Dr. that my brother works for (she is an awesome family practice m.d/holistic dr) she is going to be our baby's doc. I wish she did ob. I asked for new doctor recommendations and she gave me a few. I called the new practice and set up a consult for next week. Later today I have the lovely privilege of called my current doctors office and arranging to get some of money back and to pick up my medical records. You just know that is going to go over easily.

Updates to come.


Miss X


*****Update*****
Or should I say non-update. This is starting to feel like an episode of Punked. I called the office first thing this morning and asked for the office manager. They gave me the "She just stepped from her desk" line and sent me her voicemail. I left a very polite and direct message. I told her that since I am unable to switch doctors in their office that I went ahead and found a new doctor. I said I would like a call back so I can set up a time to come get my records and my credit back. No call back and it has been over 4 hours. Definitely avoiding me. This is so stupid I'm starting to think it is funny.

The Plot Thickens...

Thank you all for your great encouragement! I know that is what needed to be done, but I needed a kick in the butt.

I finally worked up the courage to call about an hour ago. (Actually I called first thing, but my Dr.'s MA answered the phone and I chickened out) I ask the girl who answers if I can make a consult appointment to potentially switch doctors. I tell her that my current Dr. is a nice person, but that we don't exactly fit well. The receptionist replied with major attitude that "the clinic does not like to let patients switch doctors". She then tells me she will have to put me on hold. After close to five minutes on hold she comes back and tells me that I will have to speak to the office manager and she will have to call me back later.

!!!!!

I have now gone from feeling bad about hurting my current doc's feelings to seriously pissed! I never in a million years thought they would give me grief about switching! WOW! I don't even know what to say. I'm wondering what in the world the office manager is going to say. It really makes me hesitant to go to anyone in that clinic. I may end up asking for my medical records, a refund of the money that hasn't been used and find someone else.

Can you believe this?


Miss X

Medically Frustrated

I had my third OB appointment today. First thing is first. The baby is just fine. Heartbeat nice and strong at 160 bpm. My uterus is measuring perfect. Urine is fine. They are thrilled with my very slow weight gain. I'm up 1 1/2 to 2 pounds from 5 weeks ago, making me negative 2 lbs total from their starting weight for me.

Now my issues. From the very first appointment this Dr. has never felt right to me. I am a pretty "natural", non-medicalized kind of person. I believe there is a place for Western medicine but I believe it is way over used. I want a natural, low intervention pregnancy and birth. Of course if anything goes high risk or wrong I would change my plans accordingly. I'm a vitamin taking, cloth grocery bag carrying, vegetarian. Long story short, I'm a North West hippie.

I really wanted a midwife, but I bowed to family pressure who insisted on a M.D. (Sigh) I should have stuck to my guns and I definitely will next time (if I am lucky enough to have a next time). I chose my current OB pretty blindly. None of my friends who have had babies around here have my philosophy on medical things and so they were no help in finding the proper doctor. I did as much research as I could and I chose a doctor who I *thought* would be open minded to more natural things. I was wrong. Hubby and I have come to refer to her as the "worst case scenario" doctor. She is very alarmist. Everything is talked about in the absolute worst case possible. She even went on and on to me about someones baby who died of listeria at my very first appointment! Who does that? When I have mentioned having a natural birth she said "well that would be nice, but everyone gets an epidural eventually". WTH? I can't even tell you how many times she has brought up some obscure thing happening (like listeria) and how the baby can die.

There are two main hospitals in my area. One hospital is very high tech and very drill sergeant. It is known as the hospital where they quickly stick you in bed, get the epidural, start the pitocin, break your water, and move you on out. The hospital is very anti-natural. The other hospital is much more natural friendly. They encourage you to walk, use the private whirlpool tubs, etc. They also have multiple awards from W.H.O. for being a birth friendly hospital and many breastfeeding awards. I brought up delivering at the "crunchy" hospital today and my OB basically refused. She made obscure references to that hospital "not being safe". I questioned her on it and she refused to elaborate. She said that we need the baby to be safe. I said that of course I agree, but that if a pregnancy is normal that birth is a natural, safe experience for most people. Bottom line we are not on the same page.

I'm really stressed out about this. We have already been making our monthly payments to this medical office towards the birth. I think we would have a hard time getting the money back. There are other doctors at the same office and I'm thinking the money could be applied to someone else there. I'm just not sure if I would have a better experience with someone else there. I don't know. Do you think I should call the office and express my concerns? I really don't want to be labeled a "difficult" patient, but I'm also unhappy with how things are. I see everything I don't want happening with my current doctor. I really think it is too late to go to a different medical group, especially considering the money.

Advice please. If you felt like me, what would you do? I'm really stressing about all of this.


Miss X

So In Love

My doppler arrived in the mail today!

I immediately set to work on setting the thing up, reading the instructions and all of that good stuff. It took some searching. I would get what I think was the baby for 1-2 seconds and then he/she would move away. Finally I got a good reading for about 20 seconds. It was beating a beautiful 162bpm!

The baby is really there! I guess I didn't dream it up! OMG, I heard MY baby's heartbeat! It was the most beautiful sound in the world.

I am so in love.


Miss X

Symptoms, No Belly, Oh My!

5 1/2 months left!

I can't wait! Time was going by really fast and now it seems to have slowed down. I'm ready to look pregnant and to feel the baby move. Patience isn't my strong point.

I am so anxious to show. The belly shots I posted were really deceiving. I can still easily button all of my regular clothes. No one would ever guess I am pregnant. Even those who know say I don't look pregnant. The only one who sees a difference is my hubby and maybe he is just being sweet. I still haven't gained a pound back so maybe that is why?

It is hard to imagine that next month I will hit the half way point and should be feeling the baby move! How is it possible for all of that to happen when I look so regular right now? Well, my boobs are abnormally large, but that is about it. Bring on the belly!

Last week I broke down and bought a doppler on eB*y. It was the same price as two months rent on a doppler so I went ahead and bought it. I should get it sometime this week. I am excited and nervous all at once. I am hoping for reassurance, but worried I will freak out if I can't find the heartbeat. I'm thinking I should be far enough along to be able to find it.

In symptoms news I am still pretty darn tired! Where is the 2nd trimester energy rush? Maybe it is still coming? My appetite is insane! I cannot believe the amount of food I consume. I should have gained 20 pounds by now. Why I'm not gaining is beyond me! And low back/sciatica pain! OUCH! I have fairly severe scoliosis so I was warned my pain would be worse and sooner then most. It has struck the last week or so. It is all so worth every pain though. I cannot wait to meet this baby.

I'm going to try to post a bit more often. I should have an update this week about my doppler experience. Until then...bye.


Miss X

2nd Trimester!!!

WOOT! WOOT!!

Can you believe it? I can't! I am actually in the second trimester. I didn't think this time would ever come. It is beyond surreal. I am so grateful to be at this point.

I'm still having a hard time believing I am really pregnant (are you so over it yet?). I realized over the weekend that I didn't truly expect to make it to the 2nd tri. I really thought the rug would be pulled out from me. I'm definitely aware that things could still go wrong. But I am now at the point where I have a 99% chance of bringing home a baby in about 6 months. Wow. Wow. Wow.

I am so grateful. I cannot wait to have this baby.

More updates later. Today is celebrate the 2nd trimester day!


Miss X